With the rising cost of gasoline, Peter is beginning to worry about his drinking habit.

There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Peter.

70% of a human's weight is water. 70% of Peters' weight is his dick.

If a girl is approached by Peter in her dreams....she wakes up and apologizes.

Peter never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself out of fear.

The word 'sex' was invented by Peter. Other words were 'sexy', 'sexiness', and 'womanizer'.

Peter never gets lucky with women. Women get lucky with Peter.

Peter doesn't 'tap' a keg. He tells it he wants a beer.

If you divide Peter by zero you will get one. One sexy womanizer.

There is no such thing as a lesbian, just a woman who has never met Peter

Peter doesn't say "who's your daddy", because he knows the answer.

Peter originally wrote the first dictionary. The definition for each word is as follows - Sexy.

50% of the steel in the world is in China. The other 50% is Peters Abdominal.

Peter doesn't rate women by 1-10. He rates them by Yes or No.

Mr. T pities the fool. Peter had sex with Mr. T's mom.

Peter likes his beer like he likes his women. Foaming at the mouth.

Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold. Everything Peter touches has sex with him.

Peter doesn’t like women, women like Peter.

If there was a country of 100% women, the currency would be peters.

The 9th wonder of the world is Peter, the 8th is Peter’s dick.

Peter doesn’t pay for prostitutes, prostitutes pay for Peter.

Peter doesn’t approach women, he waits.

Peter doesn’t go the fitness, the fitness goes to Peter.

Girls don’t go to a club to drink and party, they go to see Peter.